________________________________________________________________________________________ Suddenly, I have a very strong decision. I have decided that I will NOT have any kids of my own at least for the next couple of years down the road.

I have never liked children before. (except the newly born babies which I still find them adorable and innocent) To me, I find them a nuisance. I was never a patient person so to me, yes they are irritable especially after staying long time together with his sister two kiddos as they are always fighting, shouting every now and then and also after attending a few times of his elder sister's son birthday party. Bunch of kids running around everywhere, screaming shouting etc etc. Okie, everyone was a kid before. Kid's nature. Like my hub says why don't I ask my parents why they gave birth to me etc? (Hello, where is the linkage here huh??) So what if my parents brought me to this world? I MUST bring my future kid to this world too? My parents may love children (that explains both my brother and I) but NOT me. So??

Secondly, I do not want my future kid to be brought up under his family situation when the grandparents (Hub's parents) are always quarreling, scolding vulgarities, smoking (FIL) every now and then and shouting at their top of voice at each other. Looking at the sister two kids you will know what I meant. Absolutely NO NO!

Thirdly, my poly mate whom just got married only about a year ago is already now filing for separation (soon to be divorce case). They have a baby girl. I think his wife should be thankful enough that my poly mate is not intending to fight for his daughter's custody as he told me that he will respect his wife decision of wanting their daughter. Perhaps I am pessimistic, but I don't want my situation to be like him in future that we will have to fight for the children custody should we file for separation or divorce. It can be very hassle. Yes, I m not really optimistic about our marriage. I am serious.

Lastly, I am not confident about being a good mother. I have a very bad temper and I know I do not have lot's of patience. I don't want my kid to come to this world and end up me being a very bad mother which he/she will hate me. This is the least I will want to imagine.

                                                            ~THE END~ PAST ♠ FUTURE

Suddenly, I have a very strong decision. I have decided that I will NOT have any kids of my own at least for the next couple of years down the road.

I have never liked children before. (except the newly born babies which I still find them adorable and innocent) To me, I find them a nuisance. I was never a patient person so to me, yes they are irritable especially after staying long time together with his sister two kiddos as they are always fighting, shouting every now and then and also after attending a few times of his elder sister's son birthday party. Bunch of kids running around everywhere, screaming shouting etc etc. Okie, everyone was a kid before. Kid's nature. Like my hub says why don't I ask my parents why they gave birth to me etc? (Hello, where is the linkage here huh??) So what if my parents brought me to this world? I MUST bring my future kid to this world too? My parents may love children (that explains both my brother and I) but NOT me. So??

Secondly, I do not want my future kid to be brought up under his family situation when the grandparents (Hub's parents) are always quarreling, scolding vulgarities, smoking (FIL) every now and then and shouting at their top of voice at each other. Looking at the sister two kids you will know what I meant. Absolutely NO NO!

Thirdly, my poly mate whom just got married only about a year ago is already now filing for separation (soon to be divorce case). They have a baby girl. I think his wife should be thankful enough that my poly mate is not intending to fight for his daughter's custody as he told me that he will respect his wife decision of wanting their daughter. Perhaps I am pessimistic, but I don't want my situation to be like him in future that we will have to fight for the children custody should we file for separation or divorce. It can be very hassle. Yes, I m not really optimistic about our marriage. I am serious.

Lastly, I am not confident about being a good mother. I have a very bad temper and I know I do not have lot's of patience. I don't want my kid to come to this world and end up me being a very bad mother which he/she will hate me. This is the least I will want to imagine.

                                                            ~THE END~